T.W.O.D.s

Angry Grammarian made the following announcement:

Family and Friends,

I'm quasi-famous.

Okay, not famous at all, really, but it's exciting for me: the Georgetown English dept has decided to include graduate assistants on the faculty web page, so today marks the debut of my pseudo-professional web page.

You can find me on the faculty web page, very, very close to the
>bottom of the page.

Click on my name for a short bio and a very flattering picture.

Be sure to reply and tell me how good I look and how smart I sound.

From Behind the Bar said:

Very Nice Joe! However, I didn't see a mention of your extensive studies in the field of Boozology, with special attention to the sleeping habits of creatures under the influence of alcohol and their relationship with characteristic leaves,bark, twigs, pertaining to black, red and silver maple trees.

I even remember you completed field studies at great length at the Eagles Sanctuary, where you studied under Profs. Thornton, Thornton, Thornton, and Napolitano.

I feel Georgetown would be very interested to hear your findings!

I also appreciate the "Prime Time" flare you went with for your picture. Also, noting that nearly ever other faculty member went with the canned black and white image of row boat on river.

Best of Luck,
Prof. Thornton

Angry Grammarian said:

Liz often remarks about the comic genius of Tommy's emails.

Any shred of skepticism I had remaining has been obliterated by this most recent epistle.

A work of art; I bow down before the master.

From Behind the Bar said:

No need to bow Young Joseph, your affectionate praise is enough.

Instead let us walk to together, shoulder to shoulder as equals, to receive the
accolades that are due to us; great men of eloquent email.

From Behind the Bar said:

Copies of letters from my archives are forwarded for a small processing fee of $500.00. This tiny fee helps to defray the cost of employing 100's of co-op student through our charitable organization, Tools without Direction (T.W.O.D.s). The students help in the cataloging and retrieval of some of the worlds most priceless pieces of literature in the world.

For more information or if you would like to make additional donations or if you would like to sponsor a T.W.O.D. please write to us at:

T.W.O.D.
2050 Bytnchok Lane
San Diego, CA 98765-4321
Attn: Big Boss Dog

Thank you for purchasing another masterpiece. Any reproduction or unauthorized distribution of said literary works, will be met with legal action from the foundation's legal representative, one Dirty Old Town, Esq.